Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
