what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
