I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize