Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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