playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
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there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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