I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
