Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I just made out with a guy for $7.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
