even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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