Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
