Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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