i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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