maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
