I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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