she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
