is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
