He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
