i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Randomize
