look no pants
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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