He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize