Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
