we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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