pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
