whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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