at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
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He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
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"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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