Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
