Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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