Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
why do cheetos always look like penises
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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