i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like death gave me a hand job
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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