You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
