I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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