I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
