Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
