I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
The uberlube is also flammable
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
