I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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