Can Purell be used as lube?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
it's great music for shaving your balls
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
