actually, I'm a sock model
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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