8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
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I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
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There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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