your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
