It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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