then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize