Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
