Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
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she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
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why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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