How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize