Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Randomize
