U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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