My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
