Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
