i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car