Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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