Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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