i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
